Jokes

Anything and Everything about Uplink

Moderators: jelco, bert_the_turtle, Chris, Icepick, Rkiver

SAE
level1
level1
Posts: 65
Joined: Fri Jul 04, 2003 2:28 pm
Location: Scotland

Postby SAE » Mon Aug 04, 2003 4:53 pm

I've found clean jokes ( it sucks)


their one-liners

Love is grand, divorce is hundred grand

Never be afraid to try somthing new.  Remeber, amateurs built the ark; professionals built the Titanic

and

Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand
I WANT A PSP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:)
User avatar
Phydaux
level5
level5
Posts: 1615
Joined: Tue Feb 26, 2002 3:00 am
Location: Cardiff, UK
Contact:

Postby Phydaux » Mon Aug 04, 2003 5:03 pm

Quote: from SAE on 2:39 pm on July 4, 2003[br]yo phydaux
What?
SAE
level1
level1
Posts: 65
Joined: Fri Jul 04, 2003 2:28 pm
Location: Scotland

Postby SAE » Mon Aug 04, 2003 5:06 pm

Quote: from SAE on 7:40 pm on Aug. 3, 2003[br]fine then you tell me a clean funny joke


found some clean jokes (check jokes pg 30)
I WANT A PSP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



:)
User avatar
Phydaux
level5
level5
Posts: 1615
Joined: Tue Feb 26, 2002 3:00 am
Location: Cardiff, UK
Contact:

Postby Phydaux » Mon Aug 04, 2003 5:12 pm

Quote: from SAE on 5:06 pm on Aug. 4, 2003[br]
Quote: from SAE on 7:40 pm on Aug. 3, 2003[br]fine then you tell me a clean funny joke


found some clean jokes (check jokes pg 30)
WTF are you on about?
User avatar
tabasco boy
level5
level5
Posts: 1180
Joined: Sun Mar 10, 2002 4:25 pm
Location: Lovely Planet Earth
Contact:

Postby tabasco boy » Mon Aug 04, 2003 5:18 pm

A first grade teacher in the Midwest is explaining to her class that she is a Republican and how nice it is that a new Republican president has taken office. She asks her students to raise their hands if they, too, are Republicans and support George Bush.  Everyone in class raises their hands except one little girl.  "Mary," says the teacher with surprise, "why didn't you raise your hand?"  Because I'm not a Republican," says Mary. "Well, what are you?" asks the teacher.  "I'm a Democrat and proud of it," replies the little girl.  The teacher cannot believe her ears. "My goodness, Mary, why are you a Democrat?" she asks. "Well, my momma and papa are Democrats, so I'm a Democrat, too."  "Well," says the teacher in an annoyed tone, "that's no reason for you to be a Democrat. You don't always have to be like your parents. What if your momma was a criminal and your papa was a criminal, too, what would you be then?" Mary smiled. "Then we'd be Republicans."
Eating without Tabasco® Sauce is like a computer without a OS.
SAE
level1
level1
Posts: 65
Joined: Fri Jul 04, 2003 2:28 pm
Location: Scotland

Postby SAE » Mon Aug 04, 2003 5:19 pm

I don't know
I WANT A PSP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



:)
twistedfinger
level1
level1
Posts: 10
Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2003 6:52 pm
Location: Cardiff

Postby twistedfinger » Mon Aug 04, 2003 7:14 pm

ummm, SAE, have you ever actually played on an X-Box, or were you blindfolded when you were trying to play it.  I have had a PS1 & 2 among other consoles and own an x-box and I can tell you that the X-Box is by far superior than any other console on the market.  Have you played Halo? or are you one of the people that turned it on, got bored for lack of patients and never gave the game a chance?

:)
make it so...
SAE
level1
level1
Posts: 65
Joined: Fri Jul 04, 2003 2:28 pm
Location: Scotland

Postby SAE » Mon Aug 04, 2003 7:50 pm

Ive play all modern systems and I've lern that the PS2 is much better than the X-box
I WANT A PSP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



:)
twistedfinger
level1
level1
Posts: 10
Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2003 6:52 pm
Location: Cardiff

Postby twistedfinger » Tue Aug 05, 2003 1:58 am

Well each to their own I suppose, I still stand in my corner and back the X-Box, to me is really leads the market with the consoles.  Don't get me wrong, I think the PS2 is a great machine I just can't get used to the controls after handling an x-box one! the PS2 one seems so tiny in comparison! :)
make it so...
User avatar
Phydaux
level5
level5
Posts: 1615
Joined: Tue Feb 26, 2002 3:00 am
Location: Cardiff, UK
Contact:

Postby Phydaux » Tue Aug 05, 2003 3:39 am

Quote: from SAE on 7:50 pm on Aug. 4, 2003[br]Ive play all modern systems and I've lern that the PS2 is much better than the X-box
By "lern" do you mean "Brainwashed by Sony corp."?

anyway.... back on topic...

A string walks into a bar and asks for a drink.
The Bar-tender says "We don't serve strings in here"
So the string leaves the bar slightly upset, but has an idea.
Outside he ties himself up, and messes his hair. He then returns to the bar.
The bar-tender looks at him and says "Arn't you a string?"

And the string replys "No, I'm a frayed knot"

boom-boom Boom tschhh!
ODDin
level5
level5
Posts: 2521
Joined: Fri Jul 04, 2003 10:44 pm
Location: Haifa, Israel
Contact:

Postby ODDin » Tue Aug 05, 2003 2:09 pm

About X-box and K.
I actually know a man who works for SONY, (who is the manager of a big SONY store, not a little worker...) and he said (when PS2 was brand new) that PS2 is worse than should have been, and that there are better choices for consoles.

However, I myself never played any console - neither PS2, nor X-box. (I prefer the PC :) ), so I don't judge.

"Don't judge, and you won't be judged" - or what was it?..
Ah, I'm not christian anyway, so whatever...
Adriac
level5
level5
Posts: 3504
Joined: Wed Jan 23, 2002 7:20 am

Postby Adriac » Tue Aug 05, 2003 2:46 pm

"Judge not, lest ye be judged" IIRC.

But I don't know much more than you...
00010001000100000000101100010111000 10110000100010001100001011111000101 10000100100000111100010000000011010 0001011000111100001000100001011
User avatar
Starfyre
level5
level5
Posts: 3247
Joined: Sat Jun 29, 2002 3:00 pm
Location: in the tree house

Postby Starfyre » Tue Aug 05, 2003 3:14 pm

Best console:

Super Nintendooo!!!

Yeah it's old, but hey, Graphics are okay, sound is good and it's fast, fun and the games were cool!
bgreene2001
level5
level5
Posts: 1310
Joined: Sat Dec 22, 2001 3:46 pm
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Postby bgreene2001 » Tue Aug 05, 2003 3:17 pm

I'm personally not that picky.  If a console is half decent, I'll like it.  I like my PS2, I likes my PlayStation, etc, all the Nintendo consoles I owned, and I'm sure I'd like XBox/Game Cube if I owned either one.
Personally, if it's any good at all and something new, I'll probably play it.  Although I prefer games like GTA3/VC, Uplink, FreeLancer, etc, where you get to choose what you want to do outside the storyline.  Helps for playability.
I swear Officer, I didn't know she was 4!
My Profile, my mates site, Bloody Mongrel.  Great stuff.
Click here to help me get some free magnets :)  Pleeeease?
Pacemeyer
level1
level1
Posts: 22
Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2003 10:50 pm

Postby Pacemeyer » Tue Aug 05, 2003 4:34 pm

There are two borthers, one aged 8 and the other 12. These two are always getting into trouble. If something bad happened in town their parents knew these two were involved some way or another.

The parents found that there was a new clergiman in town who was very good at disciplining children.

The parents arranged for the kids to meet this clergiman and the 8 year-old was to go in first.

The clergiman and the child sat down and the clergiman, in a stern voice, asked; "Where is God?"
The boy just sat there frozen.
The Clergiman stood up and asked; "Where is God?"
Again th boy was frozen.
The Clergiman yelled; "WHERE IS GOD?"
At that the boy ran out and all the way home and hid in a closet. The 12 year-old followed him and asked; "Whats wrong?"
The younger answered with; "God's missing and they think we did it."
"... freeflow of information is the only safeguard against tyranny. The once chained people who's leaders at last loose their grip on informartion flow will soon burst with vitality, but, the free nation gradually constricting its grip on public discourse

Return to “General”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests