My life is a practical joke.

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My life is a practical joke.

Postby Feud » Mon Nov 17, 2008 4:34 am

What follows are musings, feel free to skip. First, a little background:

As most of you know I'm a practicing member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormon). I don't know how much you all know of the doctrines, but in our belief marriage to another member in one of our Temple is considered one of the most critically important and sacred ordinances.

It's something that I've wanted ever since I gained a testimony, and something I've spent the last six years trying to prepare myself to be worthy and ready of. In a few months I'll graduate from one of our colleges, one of the few who didn't get married. As you might imagine, the cultural pressure isn't exactly light.

Never the less, despite things not working out like I would have preferred, I'm glad I haven't done something stupid and gotten myself into being a divorce statistic (which is all too high among us due to people being idiots, and giving into hormones or pressure).

That all being said, I find myself in an interesting situation. Namely, that I actually have found someone. She's a wonderful woman, funny, independent, and graduating in a month with an English degree (she's going to be a teacher). We spend quite a bit of time together, we love each other very much, and she has made it quite clear to me, both on days past and just this afternoon, that all I have to do is ask and there will be a Mrs. Feud at my side.

There is one slight problem: she's Jewish. I don't mean just ethnically Jewish, or biologically Jewish, I mean she is fully faithful and practicing. Even though she attends an LDS school, she doesn't believe in any of our teachings, and is as firmly convinced that Judaism is the correct as I am of Mormonism. As such I have had to make the choice of either going after her and abandoning my religious beliefs, or trusting that by letting her go that things will work out. I've decided to trust.

So I arrive at the thread title. After years of trying to find someone, things finally click with one of the only 17 women on this campus with whom it can't work out (there are over 13,000 students, 35 of which are non members, so I just assumed a 50/50 gender divide). I'm sure that one day I'll look back and laugh about this, as I'm sure that somewhere right now someone is getting a chuckle, but for now it's a real head shaker.
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Re: My life is a practical joke.

Postby rus|Mike » Mon Nov 17, 2008 4:57 am

Feud wrote:As such I have had to make the choice of either going after her and abandoning my religious beliefs, or trusting that by letting her go that things will work out. I've decided to trust.

A very bad choise it was. Even though I don't think I can judge much about your "teachings" as far as I (like, I think, most people) have a strong prejudice about all that sect stuff, leaving the opportunity of having a really suiting you partner (gotta be happy to have such opportunity even ONCE in the whole life) in the favour of some "teaching" is... dumb?...
Feud wrote:After years of trying to find someone, things finally click with one of the only 17 women on this campus with whom it can't work out (there are over 13,000 students, 35 of which are non members, so I just assumed a 50/50 gender divide).

Isn't it Life, giving you some obvious hints? :wink:
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Postby xander » Mon Nov 17, 2008 6:01 am

Yet another reason for rational people to not be religious. Because the magical sky fairy that you believe in and the magical sky fairy that she believes in are different, there is no reconciliation. I find that to be really, really sad.

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Postby Lelouch » Mon Nov 17, 2008 6:08 am

Unbelievable... leaving someone you love that could be your partner for an entire life, that would share good and bad things with you, never letting you to face the troubles alone for a.... cult?

I laugh at your face for posting this crap here. What do you expect peoples to write? To tell you to hold on, that you did right thing and that you'll find someone better? No way. In my opinion you either dumb as a fu*king tree or you never really loved her.

How can someone even think to choose between religion that was invented by peoples to control other peoples and denounce womens as lower beings?
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Postby Feud » Mon Nov 17, 2008 6:33 am

I don't think we've met before Lelouch, welcome to the forum.

Lelouch wrote:What do you expect peoples to write? To tell you to hold on, that you did right thing and that you'll find someone better??


No actually, that's not what I expected at all. In fact, given the past discussions I've been involved with on this forum, I would have been surprised if that was the prevailing sentiment.
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Postby vanarbulax » Mon Nov 17, 2008 6:36 am

Wow, I can't imagine being in this situation. Suffice to say the from my perspective I don't think marrying someone of a different religion/non-religion means abandoning your principles. If I was to marry someone religious that wouldn't mean I was suddenly abandoning my belief that the belief in a god is irrational. I would marry someone because we get along and will make a good pair despite, no regardless of what our religious belies are or lack of. And Lelouch can you at least show a little bit of empathy instead of just calling someone an idiot?
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Postby Lelouch » Mon Nov 17, 2008 6:51 am

He doesn't need sympathy and he knows hes an idiot and hell regret both posting this and abandoning her later. Ive seen person abandoning his home, country and wasting loads of money to be with whom he loved and all that was necessary from Feud is to broaden his views and have a little faith in something more visible, touchable and feelable (there is no such word i know) than The God almighty.

Feud wrote:I don't think we've met before Lelouch, welcome to the forum.

Lelouch wrote:What do you expect peoples to write? To tell you to hold on, that you did right thing and that you'll find someone better?


No actually, that's not what I expected at all. In fact, given the past discussions I've been involved with on this forum, I would have been surprised if that was the prevailing sentiment.


Rarely do i find myself involved in such discussions but enlighten me if you want on a purpose of your post? In my opinion your feeling pity for yourself and want others to feel that as well. But again only in my opinion what you really need is to sort this out with her and/or councilor rather than peoples you don't know on this forum. Its just since you already posted i feel myself permitted to speak up my mind without looking on amount of posts or amount of time spent on this forum.
Last edited by Lelouch on Mon Nov 17, 2008 6:58 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby vanarbulax » Mon Nov 17, 2008 6:58 am

Yeah but calling some "dumb as a fu*king tree" isn't a way to convince people of your viewpoint. In fact I'm not sympathetic towards Feud's decision, I think it was a very very bad one and his own doing. I never said to give Feud sympathy but instead try to have a little bit of empathy (there's a very big difference) before insulting someone. Basically what I'm saying is try not to come across as a jackass and any opinion and discussion is welcome.
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Postby Lelouch » Mon Nov 17, 2008 7:05 am

Im not a jackass nor do i try to convince him. It his choice, for all i care he could go and have himself few dozen wives which would share his religion if it.. pleases him. Then again im afraid that i can't show my opinion without using tad stronger words than "sorry", "shame" and "dumb". Not to mention that only profane word i used had * in it:o
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Postby KingAl » Mon Nov 17, 2008 7:11 am

Yes, asterisks remove all offensiveness, you f*cking troglodyte.
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Postby Feud » Mon Nov 17, 2008 7:14 am

Lelouch wrote:Rarely do i find myself involved in such discussions but enlighten me if you want on a purpose of your post? In my opinion your feeling pity for yourself and want others to feel that as well. But again only in my opinion what you really need is to sort this out with her and/or councilor rather than peoples you don't know on this forum.


The purpose of my post was similar in nature to the purpose of your responses, that is certain events resulted in certain thoughts and feelings which I felt compelled to share. Personally, I've found that when something is troubling me and I formally write it down that it helps me clear my mind about the matter.

Lelouch wrote:Its just since you already posted i feel myself permitted to speak up my mind without looking on amount of posts or amount of time spent on this forum.


I never questioned you're right to express your opinion nor it's legitimacy, I only explained that my own tenure has provided me with certain expectations on what responses may result from my actions.

A question if I may, why does the post upset you so? I can understand disagreement, but you seem down right angry.
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Postby vanarbulax » Mon Nov 17, 2008 7:20 am

First of all we can say fucking here, censoring swear words just annoy me if your going to say fucking just say it. Secondly I'm not going to stop you from expressing your opinion however you want, I was just assuming that the reason you were expressing it was to convince others and have a discussion. If you just want to shout out your opinion and not care if anyone takes it seriously be my guest, I thought that you'd like to be informed that generally people on this forum like to have civil and meaningful discussions. Anyway that concludes my argument, I'm sure that Feud can handle whatever comments he gets hoping you could express your opinion in a way that people would actually give a damn about it.
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Postby Lelouch » Mon Nov 17, 2008 7:22 am

KingAl wrote:Yes, asterisks remove all offensiveness, you f*cking troglodyte.


They do, otherwise peoples wouldn't use them. Simple really.

Feud wrote:A question if I may, why does the post upset you so? I can understand disagreement, but you seem down right angry.


Well technically its a combination of two things, first is that i was in similar situation, no it wasn't the religion but it was close enough. Second is that i despise peoples who choose any belief over personal judgment and feeling, be it religion, social movement or public opinion.

To put it simple, avoiding mistakes while you still can is easier than doing them and then regretting and remember rest of your life.

vanarbulax wrote:First of all we can say fucking here, censoring swear words just annoy me if your going to say fucking just say it. Secondly I'm not going to stop you from expressing your opinion however you want, I was just assuming that the reason you were expressing it was to convince others and have a discussion. If you just want to shout out your opinion and not care if anyone takes it seriously be my guest, I thought that you'd like to be informed that generally people on this forum like to have civil and meaningful discussions. Anyway that concludes my argument, I'm sure that Feud can handle whatever comments he gets hoping you could express your opinion in a way that people would actually give a damn about it.


Meh i thought it would be censored, but anyway i didn't shout, i expressed my opinion in cold anger, like i wanted - simply and openly. I can hardly understand your excitement since swearing isn't even prohibited.
Last edited by Lelouch on Mon Nov 17, 2008 7:30 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Feud » Mon Nov 17, 2008 7:29 am

Lelouch wrote:Second is that i despise peoples who choose any belief over personal judgment and feeling, be it religion, social movement or public opinion.


When there are two competing interests in one's life, isn't the decision to chose one over the other an exercise and following of personal judgment? Second, who said feeling is absent in one aspect, while present in another? Quite the contrary in fact, I assure you that my personal feelings are quite present on either side, pulling me in both directions. Were it not so, this would be a much easier situation to be in.

Also, why would I regret this the rest of my life? Would a later love who shares more of my values and beliefs not be possible?
Last edited by Feud on Mon Nov 17, 2008 7:35 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Lelouch » Mon Nov 17, 2008 7:35 am

Feud wrote:
Lelouch wrote:Second is that i despise peoples who choose any belief over personal judgment and feeling, be it religion, social movement or public opinion.


When there are two competing interests in one's life, isn't the decision to chose one over the other an exercise and following of personal judgment? Second, who said feeling is absent in one aspect, while present in another? Quite the contrary in fact, I assure you that my personal feelings are quite present on either side, pulling me in both directions. Were it not so, this would be a much easier situation to be in.

Also, why would I regret this the rest of my life? Would a later love who shares more of my values and beliefs not be possible?


And this is where you overlooked one tiny flaw. Your feeling for religion was put inside you by others, it gradually build up by your desires for knowledge, truth seeking or achieving some higher understanding. Love and feelings however are always present inside any living human, even if they are perverted like in the minds of killers and perverts.

Well most of the peoples do regret such life changing decisions for the rest of their lives, not everyone tho. And of course you MIGHT find another love later, the question is however why looking someone else if you already found someone. Also consider the possibility where you DON'T find someone else
Last edited by Lelouch on Mon Nov 17, 2008 7:41 am, edited 3 times in total.

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