Defcon Fightin' Talk

[Phrage]

PC Gamer when reviewing Defcon had a little side bit on Fightin' Talk (say in a deep south american accent), things we didn't say enough before playing Defcon. Such things as:
"I'm about to make Htiler look like he wasn't trying."
"If you nuke Sao Paolo, you're fired"
"You just randomised the limb count for everyone born in Paris in the next hundred years. I hope you're happy."
"How could anyone bomb Hiroshima? Tokyo is right there"

Post your best fightin' talk

[alphager]

Moscow's corruption rate down by 100 percent.

[dazDEFCON1]

i hope i dont offend anyone its just a joke ok

hits terran "ahhh terroism is over"
bombs all of europe except britain "say no the euro" UKIP pwns
fires at canada "sir we hit nothing but trees its like the predetor"
nukes africa "there going to a better place.....no really they ARE"
nukes britain "haha now the chavs that stole my watch will pay"

[Michaeru]

When somebody nuked my Tokio, I said "ah, hell, the Japanese should be used it".

[unknown]

(After everyone turned and nuked the hell out of america and south america) "Well, I guess we all know where the post-apocalyptic future of humanity *won't* start."

[Xan]

1st stick this topic =)

secoundly.

"Stop nuking iraq lets bomb georgia in stead"

[Red Dawn]

"I just nuked my hometown"

[Mas Tnega]

"Where's your X now?"
Where X could be:
"Geneva Convention"
"Allah"
"White House"
"Stiff upper lip"
"Bobsleigh team"
"Liberty"
"Human Rights"

It's a thing that needs run into the ground before I'm satisfied that I've sucked all the humour out of it.

[Feud]

If I"m bombing NA i usually will toss out a:

"Good morning Mr. President!" or "Good morning America, here's your eye opener! (I sometimes replace it with "some coffee")

A more general one is "I just made _______ into the worlds largest night light (or glow stick)"

Finally, I always liked the old "I'm going to make your pee glow in the dark!"

[CanoeMan]

It started when I sent a wave of bombers from my carrier group and took out the US east cost. My comment: "I've always wanted to visit Washington. I guess I'm too late!" His reply was to hit my London with four or five nukes, after which he comments: "I hear London is nice this time of nuclear winter."

The black humor is one of the best things with Defcon.

[rawera]

One time while my Moscow was suffering a number of hits I said in public chat "Wow, anyone seen Moscow lately?" then a few seconds later I said "Yeah...me neither."

Black humor is, as previously mentioned, one of the best things about Defcon.

[Neuroleptic]

the us-east coast was glowing bright white and i said: "Its gettin' hot in here...so take off all your clothes *sings*"

[Xan]

While getting nukes over my russian terr

"damn i used to play there when i was a kid.."

[Adolf]

After a massive silo launch hitting china......"well that should solve their population problem"

[Yokenzkov]

"I did what Germany couldn't. Bye bye, Leningrad!"